Reflection is Remedy

I honestly did not expect this speech to be that amazing when I first clicked it, but by the time she was done speaking I literally had shivers up my spine.  This was an amazing and touching speech about human suffering and poverty and the role of imagination in escaping it…and by imagination JK Rowling did not mean magic, but the creativity and education needed to benefit the powerless and voiceless.

SubhanAllah:

http://www.ted.com/talks/jk_rowling_the_fringe_benefits_of_failure.html

My friend and I recently went to an event sponsored by CAIR.  Before we entered the room, a bald Caucasian man stopped my friend and I and told us that he was conducting a federal investigation.  I was a bit startled but I thought it was a census so I relaxed a bit.  I smiled at the FBI agent.  However he did not smile back.  He was serious and even somewhat a bit…nervous?  I began to feel extremely uncomfortable.

He asked me for my full name and address, he asked my friend and I why did we come to this event and how did we hear about it?  Meanwhile he was writing all of this down.   He asked us if we ever went to a halaqah.  At this point he began asking my friend more questions because he saw my hesitancy in answering.  I walked away once I saw that his attention was no longer focused on me.  I waited for my friend.  I felt so humiliated and frustrated that I wanted to go home.  I promised my friend that I would get to the bottom of this.  Once we were in the actual event room I expressed my feelings to one of the sisters in the room.  She looked at me and smiled, “They’re actors.”

UNBELIEVABLE.  It was all a part of the event, to keep us aware of this reality and how we should and should not respond.  This was powerful and unforgettable.

Here are some things I learned:

Always ask to see a badge of identification from an FBI agent.

Never open the door and allow them to come into your home.  Just open the door wide enough to step outside your home and speak to them politely outside.  Tell them that you want to cooperate and keep your country safe.  However you will not speak with them until your lawyer is present and that you are willing to set up an appointment for that.

The anti-Semitic literature of the 1920s are very similar to the literature of the far right today.

Gallup poll: Only 7% of all the FBI-documented acts of terror were committed by Muslims…what about the other 93%?

The fifth amendment was created to protect the innocent man who may be ensnared by ambiguous means.

Here is a great poem by Jalaluddin Rumi that my friend Zuhal sent in an email:

Last night
I lost my grip on reality
and welcomed insanity.

Love saw me and said,
I showed up.
Wipe your tears
and be silent.

I said, O Love
I am frightened,
but it’s not you.
Love said to me,
there is nothing that is not me.
be silent.

I will whisper secrets in your ear
just nod yes
and be silent.

A soul moon
appeared in the path of my heart.
How precious is this journey.

I said, O Love
what kind of moon is this?

Love said to me,
this is not for you to question.
be silent.

I said, O Love
what kind of face is this,
angelic, or human?

Love said to me,
this is beyond anything that you know.
Be silent.

I said, please reveal this to me
I am dying in anticipation.

Love said to me,
that is where I want you:
Always on the edge,
be silent.

You dwell in this hall of
images and illusions,
leave this house now
and be silent.

I said, O Love,
tell me this:
Does the Lord know you are
treating me this way?

Love said to me,
yes He does,
You, just be silent.

The greater the experience of pain and suffering…the greater the appreciation of happiness and pleasure.

Have you ever had a moment in life when you were completely…entirely…happy? A moment of happiness is so dear to me because I know how rare and special it is.  Every moment in which I experience this flawless happiness I want to capture on video…and replay over and over again in my mind.  When you experience a moment like this…you realize the beauty of life, you thank God that you were giving the blessing of life just to experience this one moment of bliss and ease…and relief.

After every distress is ease…surely after every distress is ease. (Qur’an)

I got this from http://questforthedivine.blogspot.com/.  Love that blog!

The Prophet (pbuh) was sitting with four of his companions (ra) — Abu Bakr, Omar, Othman and Ali.  The topic of discussion was the three things that each loved most in this world.  The Prophet (pbuh) answered first.  His three were perfume, women, and prayer.  Then he asked this same question of each of the companions.  This is what they picked.

Abu Bakr: Looking at the Prophet’s face (pbuh), making salawat on the Prophet (pbuh), and giving money to charity

Omar: Advising people, stopping wrongdoing, and saying the truth even if it’s hard

Othman: Cooking and giving people food, saying salaam to others, and making the night prayer when everyone is asleep

Ali: Fasting in summer, taking care of guests, and using the sword to defend the Prophet (pbuh)

Then Jibril came to the Prophet (pbuh) and revealed the three things that he loved most.  They were coming with the message to the world, coming to the Prophet (pbuh), and saying “alhamdulillah.”

Finally, Jibril told the Prophet this. “God sends you salaams and to the sahaba. God loves these three things: a tongue always in dhikr, a heart that’s grateful, and a body that’s tested but patient.”

This is a huge topic that I could write about.  But I just wanted to post this passage  and reflect on it quickly.  It was written by a Muslim in jail…and he is being thankful for the blessings that he has been given there.  He then expresses his newly appreciated value of the blessings people encounter on a daily basis outside of jail:

“Despite the fact that this is a maximum security facility and the restrictions are at times cumbersome, I really do not have much I can complain about. I have a place to sleep, three meals a day, and I can pray whenever I want in peace. I can think of millions of people around the world who cannot claim the same luxuries. On top of that, one sometimes needs a place like this to achieve clarity of mind. So, as the cliche goes, this has been a blessing in disguise in that I’ve been able to benefit from various aspects of incarceration that would ordinarily seem undesirable. I can only think of the countless imprisoned Muslims in the jails of tyrants around the globe and hope that if it is not Allah’s Decree to free them in the near future, that they taste the sweetness that Allah has placed them in prison to taste.  May Allah free our sisters sooner than later.

I would like to end this letter by reminding all who read it to realize what you have been blessed with before it is taken from you: the warm hug of a loved one, the company of righteous people, the ability to see the sun and moon, a breath of fresh air, praying in a mosque, hearing the Qur’an recited, reading a good book of your choosing, taking a shower with clean water whenever you feel like, even something as simple as being able to open a door and walk out of a room! If there is one lesson that everybody can learn in here  be they Muslim or kafir  that is to take the initiative to appreciate the value of the luxuries you are blessed with before they are taken from under your nose. We hear this in every khutbah but one unfortunately cannot truly appreciate this advice until all these delights of life are out of reach, in actuality. (I highly suggest Cummings The Enormous Room in this regard, if you can find a copy, where he describes, in candid detail, life in a French prison camp stripped of all the material possessions that were once within easy grasp.) Indeed, prison only makes the Muslim stronger”

I have often thought about this.  This idea of experiencing loss (or pain)  in order to understand value (and pleasure) is also a rampant theme in books such as “The Giver” and “Brave New World”.  Rumi, Ibn Ata’illah, and scores of other scholars have written at length about this.  This is why Rumi values pain…and mentions that the epitome of pain is the realization of your separation from God.  Pain is essentially a blessing from God.  However, once you are enduring it, it is definitely NOT the funnest thing in the world.  I had psychosomatic pain for a week–which is a physical pain that manifests from a psychological stress–and now I treasure and value every moment in which I am not experiencing that pain!  I remember during that week that I couldn’t understand why I couldn’t simply think or reason the pain away.  However once the issue was resolved…the pain left.  I can relate to the Muslim in jail above when he said that he values the warmth of a hug…or even the ability to open and leave a room.  Although I can’t relate to those exact blessings, I can relate to his feeling of valuting something that you once had overlooked…such as happiness and peace of mind. :)

“The West won the world not by the superiority of its ideas or values or religion but rather by its superiority in applying organized violence. Westerners often forget this fact, non-Westerners never do.”
-Samuel P. Huntington

I have come to the conclusion that it is near to impossible to remove the human ego.  It is definitely saddening and perhaps I am just far removed from Reality, but the ego is a perennial problem.  It is sort of like…unwanted hair that grows on your body…No matter how often you shave…they will keep growing back.  They may even grow back thicker than before.  But anyway…

The ego is the most cumbersome thing to carry around, but just as difficult to cast out of your life.

I now realize why many scholars of the past detested praise.  Praise is like tobacco…the more you smoke, the more you become addicted.  Sometimes people need praise and glory in order to sustain themselves.

And even if one casts aside all forms of glorification, he/she may reach a point where they feel a sense of complete worthlessness…and this may lead to depression and possibly even a lack of motivation to accomplish things.  Someone told me that even feelings of worthlessness is a sign of the ego…because true selflessness is when a person is not concerned with his/her own welfare, but the pleasure of God and the welfare of others.

I have been thinking a lot lately as you have noticed…I really wish I could be like Thoreau and Imam Ghazzali and cast aside the world as I meditate deep in the wilderness.  Of course the real sufi is the one who is active in the world and possesses the heart of detachment from it.  But I have come to a point where I am disgusted with the world and my ego and would like to resolve it through isolation.

The world is overwhelming, competitive, naive, and at times insensitive.  I am speaking about people in the world as well as the world itself.  Many people are so parochial in their views.  Yet I was just as narrow-minded.  In fact, I am still narrow-minded.  The whole process of living is to gradually enlighten and broaden your views as you grow older.  People are so different and we have to realize that there really is no such thing as superiority or inferiority with outward classifications…such as career, marital status, children status, wealth, beauty, personality.  The only classification of worth is dependent on the heart of a human being…the sincerity, the love, and the contentment found within it.  And this can only be determined by God.  How do I know what lies in the hearts of others?  Yet I am tired of people praising others based on what they are doing for the world and what kind of career they have.  Don’t you think that the janitor that cleans your toilet after you have used it has ambitions as well?!?  Maybe they couldn’t afford or weren’t able to receive the same type of education you have.  But I swear, the heart of the janitor could be so pure and overflowing with sincerity that he is valued in the eyes of God FAR above the professionals who publicly display their charitable deeds to others. God only knows.

May God allow us (especially myself) to live without the taint of our egos affecting our livelihood.  Ameen.

I am fascinated by poverty.  I find it refreshing that many of the poor can live and be happy with much less.  I am also envious of them because of the hadith stating that the poor will enter Paradise before the rich.

This summer I had the honor of bumping into the Phoenix House.  I went there a few times to donate by dad’s books (of which there were hundreds).  As soon as I drove through the gate I felt the ease yet liveliness of this small community.  If a resident looked at you, it was usually coupled with a smile.  I went to the main office and the guy at the front desk was smiling from ear to ear.  “I just came to donate some books…”  I said a bit slowly.  “Wow! Thanks, this is truly generous of you,” the guy responded sincerely.  A bunch of guys came to see who I was and what I wanted.  Finally a Muslim man came and it turned out that he was a counselor.  He spoke to me in Arabic.  Everyone in the room seemed amazed.  A young woman passed by and she pointed at one of the books I had brought.  “I had a book like that, can I take this?”  The Muslim counselor approved her request.

The Phoenix House is not for the poor.  But it is a safe haven for those who made the wrong decisions in life…usually with drugs, alcohol, and small crime.  They hold classes and try to influence the residents to change their lives around and become valuable assets to their communities.  I can attest to the fact that the Phoenix House is very successful in their efforts.  The Muslim counselor introduced me to a young Muslim woman who was involved with drugs and also had a beautiful baby.  She was wearing the abayah (Muslim long dress) and a hijab when I met her.  She told me how the Phoenix House altered her life and I was truly impressed.  I returned the next day to bring her two of my favorite books and other small gifts.  It was refreshing to be in this environment…an environment that is really making a difference.

As much as I liked the environment, I also felt very different.  I could tell that most of the residents of the Phoenix House had a rough upbringing.  However, everyone–whether they had a shady past or not–was friendly and warm towards me.  I returned a few more times to bring books.  I didn’t even have to leave my car before a bunch of guys would walk out to help me carry the books out of the trunk.  They were really excited to see them and they already nicknamed me “The girl with the books”.  I told one of the guys that I really liked the environment of the Phoenix House, and he said, “Yea, we’re like a commune!  A huge family.”

May God place success into their efforts.